When I'm worried about something I start making deals with God, angels the Universe..anything out there that had more power than I had. I'd promise acts of denial or acts of super kindness. As a child I learnt never to take things at face value, I knew adults were twisted liars. I became adept at sniffing out atmospheres, moods and undercurrents. It was a survival tactic. I'd then adjust my behaviour to suit the situation. It was hard, stressful work, but I was on my own. I wish I could hold my five year old self and tell me that everything would be o.k.